This weekend I was thrilled to be asked to talk about "Love" at my friend Tom and Rhonda's wedding. Since I have always wanted to get a doctorate in the "Philosophy of Love" this was an apt topic.
We spend so much time thinking about it and it is good to become clear about what this powerful force called Love really is.
Here are excerpts from the wedding speech I came up with. Enjoy:
Is there any other concept that is more important that LOVE? I spend so much of my life trying to answer many questions about Love: Specifically, 'What is it?', 'Why does it feel so good?' and 'How does so much of it fit in one body?'
We all seek it.
Like plants that receive Rain, if we have Love in our environment, we feel full of Life, Renewal and Growth.
Without it, we are like a desert plant, which even if we blossom, are Guarded, Protected and Full of Thorns.
Some people reduce Love to the chemical experience of hormones affecting our organism.
On the other end of the spectrum, others have a more exalted view of Love and consider it a Force of the Universe, existing independent of us.
The fact is, we don't fully know how to put our experience of Love into words. What we can say for sure is that it is a hugely powerful experience that can, as the expression goes, move mountains.
In spite of the power of this emotion, we only have one word in the English language to for it.
The Inuit have 28 words for snow we are told. We use the same word to express our feelings towards our siblings, our lovers and chocolate. How bizarre.
When contemplating exactly what Love is, at its essence, it is this:
For most of our life, we humans spend most of our days thinking about how we can fulfill our desires. How can others serve us.
The experience of Love creates a dramatic shift in our perspective. When we feel Love, the object of our Love, another person, group of people or thing seems to rise in importance. Our needs are not of such elevated importance anymore. The balance has shifted.
Ultimately, the recipient of our Love seems even more important than us. In fact, we would sacrifice our needs for the well-being of another.
When you think about the nature of the balance we described, when we elevate the importance of someone or something an appropriate word to describe this is "understand." We "Stand Under" another.
This idea is key to a more loving relationship and a more Loving World.
Understanding... So often we would rather spend our energy defending our position than understanding the needs of others. Propaganda is really about suppressing the views of another and propagating our views to others.
This ability to understand is what we need more in relationships whether they are between individuals or groups of individuals.
I think I'll continue this thread more later... getting too cerebral about Love is a danger. In the meantime, please take one minute at least to do the following exercise.
Find a comfortable posture away from the computer if possible. With closed eyes, a softness in the forehead and slightly parted teeth, sit and welcome the love experience into the body. Feel a brightness to the heart centre. Bask in it for as long as you like.
Spread that feeling to others.
Trust that your are tapping into a deep and boundless well.
Namaste.